My Weblog

Saturday, May 24, 2003

Geeze, i suck dont i? Sorry i've been so busy! i promise i'll blog more from now on.

last night i saw Bruce Almighty! Its freakin awesome! it was SO funny! And if you see it, how he says "Good", I do that ALL the time. I was like WEEEE! big grin when i saw jim carrey say it too. hehe. And in one part of the movie he completely looked like my dad and i was all O_O thats really creepy. Tonight me mom & john are gunna go see Bringin down the house. And hopefully tommarow or monday i can go see the matrix reloaded even though i think i'll be seeing the DVD tommarow :-D *YAY! :-D* hopefully mom will still let me go if i see it already.

Today was fun. butch is so cute. I've been making collages from magazine / newspaper things. they are pretty. Wished my scanner didn't poop out. *Growl* well i better go, John will be here soon and we shall watch cowboy bebop big grin

PS! Found out today about Daniel Warde. His parents were immigrants from Northern Ireland! Weee! Dad always told me we were Irish, but i never saw the proof. now i have big grin. So on my dads side i'm Irish, Norwegian, Swedish (all immigrated within the last 4 generations) & on my moms side (who as far back as i can trace has been in america since the 1600s) are from England. But i have more to find out about them

I love geneology ^_^

Ameya Dreamed @ 06:37 PM EST [Link] [Karma: 0 (+/-)] [1 Comment]

Saturday, May 10, 2003

Can't talk long, mom went to bank... i'm not allowed on the computer for a while, i'll explain why...


Most of you know my back has been spazing recently, well yesterday it got REALLY bad. I couldn't breathe.. I was home alone & thrashing around the house trying to find any position where the blinding pain would stop & I could catch my breath.. I was sweating buckets, a million degrees (I felt like it anyway, didnt take my temp), Bright Red, Crying my eyes out, I even too pain medication, and most of you know how bad it must have been at that point, but it just got worse. Finally i called my grandpa to see what i should do, and he told me he's coming over to get me to Urget care. Right after that mom called and i was trying to tell her but i was breathing so erratically and crying so bad and she could tell something was REALLY wrong, so she got out of work (Even though i told her not too) And said she'd meet us at UC. when I got there they rushed me into a hospital looking room and took all my vitals and they said they were pretty normal, but i COULDN'T Breathe! Or see straight it hurt so bad! They were trying to contact my mom to get permission to treat me, legal gunk.. i hate it. And finally, since they didn't wanna risk in case of an emergency, they gave me this Summin cocktail stuff that tasted like gross chalkyness and it numbed my mouth and insides i guess. It took a while but eventually the pain recceded and i could breathe, but i was getting dizzy. And they ended up giving me a shot in the "Butt" (Back of the hip) full of pain medication, when the pain had gone away (to come back a tinge later). Anyway the doctor guy was liek "Okay, what happened?" And i explained for the 6th time and he said something about a little bit of pain causing a painic attack, and telling him, I get Little & Massive pains all the time, They dont cause me panic attacks, even mom and grandpa didn't really believe him. And i mean, would YOU trust a healthcare professional that is Extremely obese to take care of YOUR body? Mom gets misdignosed by docs all the time, but she's like me. She knows when they are wrong. Anyway, He made mom pay the copay fee and sent me home, Ignoring me when I said "It's happened before, It happened now, What am I supposed to do when it happens again?" He just said "Well thats the way to think" O.o!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! IF ITS HAPPENED BEFORE, WHY WOULDN"T IT HAPPEN AGAIN?!?!?! He just gave me temporary muscle relaxants & Pain relievers. Gah. *wants to go to an Ayruvedic clinic.

So anyway moms going to come home soon so i better go. Last night was the mother daughter banquet.. the back thing almost started again, but heather was there and that night gave me a back massage which quite helped then. We spent today together too, i'll tell about it later. I lover her so much. smile She's my cousin, but we're much more like sisters. *steals her away* Oh well. Gotta hurry and get off now, mom doesn't want me sitting at this, she thinks itll mess my back again.

Love!
Ameya

Ameya Dreamed @ 03:31 PM EST [Link] [Karma: 0 (+/-)] [4 Comments]

Wednesday, February 5, 2003

i'm SO pissed off! The cop just woke meup...

Eyes of Infinite: The stupid cop woke me up!
Eyes of Infinite: i'm so mad
Eyes of Infinite: grrr
seanfan19: cop?
Eyes of Infinite: *doesn't like cop*
seanfan19: cop?
Eyes of Infinite: my mom puts my doggie outside when she goes to work at 4am & I bring her inn when i wake up sometimes
seanfan19: ok and the cop?
Eyes of Infinite: usually the dog stays in with me and wakes me up around 6. But she was barking (she does that a lot) so someone called the police
Eyes of Infinite: and he was an asshole
seanfan19: awww
seanfan19: * hugs
Eyes of Infinite: i'm just a kid, he woke me up at4 30 am and when i finally found the key to open the door he's like "Do you hear something that is a problem?" and i was like "i'm sorry.. and i told him my mom takes her outside when she goes to work and i bring her in when i wke up, i should have told him that she's usually inside untill 9am and that i'm gunna beat up whoever called. My family can sleep and we are closest to her, so honestly, after two years they'd grow up. I say so because everyone who lives around here except the couple across the street are JERKS. well they can be anyway. And urgh i wont go on cuz knowing my luck they'll find this..

So um yeah, i win the bad mood prize for today!!

Guess what? Two kids from the local high school robbed a place 2 nights ago. They were armed with Bats and stole ciggarrettes. The police dogs found them in the bushes later. My friend's uncle who is a cop says they can be charged for a year in Juvy or up to 3 years in adult prison. Guess what else? One of the guys was my friend! And one of my bestest friend's older brother, and like my older brother too. I NEVER thought he'd go and do this. I always thought he was more all talk. Its so crazy... they've been having family 'stuff' and now he just messed himself up and my friend only has her dad left in the house... And you know yesterday was his birthday! And he had to spend it in Court because of his son's mental insanity. I still can't believe one of my friends is in prison sad

On a less depressing pissed off note... Monday was so cool ... I thought about me friend Danielle for no reason, she had visited me this summer, she now lives in Vegas, and i searched everywhere for her email address that she had left, but with no luck. And then guess who calls outta nowhere that night! It was SO freaky I didn't even believe it was her on the phone at first smile. So i have her email address & I've been invited out to Los Vegas for a few weeks this summer. I'd like to go, Danielle is my friend & I LOVE Vegas & out west (used to go with dad), but i dunno how well i'd get along with her friends... we seem pretty much exact opposits... but oh well... i'll see as stuf comes along...

Now off to hypothesis who called the cops and how i'd like to shove them into prison instead of my friend.... Muahaha... okay not really, but you get the idea... Did i mention i don't like being around cops? *Shivers* (and it is't from a guilty concience either, i don't do illegallness... maybe I had bad experiences with them in past life or something cuz i've always been like this.... almost had a heart attack when i was like 8 and a cop pulled over me and my dad for being in the wrong lane with a boat. *shivers* ack...)

Posted by Ameya @ 02:51 AM EST [Link] [Karma: 0 (+/-)] [1 hobit]

Monday, February 3, 2003

Methinks i'll plug Emily & Ash for Commenting smile and of course DUSTY IS BACK!!!


Ahh I can't express this morning. I'll try anyway though... Stupid English language not having goode enough words.. so hmm... Well it was like 56 this morning & it had been kinda raining so the air was nice and fresh.. and there was a playful breeze... I walked out onto by back porch thing and it was just so heavenly... The air was just so... Ooo how to describe it... It felt like the Goddess' breath... i could feel her in the air... I sat on the railing thing (my back porch is a few feet of the ground and caged in .. i'll take a picture of it sometime) and closed my eyes and it seemed so magical... well i don't think that is the right word... it felt like the most natural thing (well duh mey, it is!) and like that is how we all are supposed to feel everything everyday... and how the world and life and air and everything as i know it, is so horribly human... and false... and like I told River, it was like a religious experience smile. I don't need to go trekk half way around the world (i forget what that word is..hmm), all i need to do is close my eyes and feel omg... i can't do it justice with words. I think River had some idea of what i spoke of... she decided to go out running half way across the city right after i mentioned it smile

So then I decided to open all the curtains and blinds and the back door and window and let light and air in smile and i went on a MASSIVE spring cleaning of most of the rooms in the house.. it was fun. It started to rain though and Clover was outside and she got uber muddy. sad I tried to wash her off but the mud had dried in her fur and i had to put her downstairs for a while sad. Oh well... do de doo... I fixed the link me buttons smile now you can put them on your site, eh? hehe :-D ooh and sign my guestmap? It's lonely sad I love you allsmile

Posted by Ameya @ 06:52 PM EST [Link] [Karma: 0 (+/-)] [No hobits]

hehe i forgot to post last night :-/. Well yesterday when i finally woke up my calfs were SO sore i couldn't walk.. i guess they aren't use to moving, hehe.. The rest of the day i basically sat here... caught up in the forums, worked on the freak productions website, talked to people... and OOO! I might get to go Visit Leah in France in April!!!! I'm SO excited!! I'll tell you more as it developes, hehee..

Posted by Ameya @ 07:04 AM EST [Link] [Karma: 0 (+/-)] [No hobits]

Saturday, February 1, 2003

Warning... Its an account of my retreat this weekend, so it is pretty long.... Skip down to the OH YEAHS and stuff to here un-retreat news smile

Weeeee! I just got back from the church retreat... It was SO awesome! Yesterday we played underground church..

(which is when someone hides a bible with a flashlight on it anywhere in 4 out of the 5 levels of our church and then we split into 'families' and pick a room to be our 'home'. Then we try to go through the church that is completely dark & Try to find the bible without getting caught by one of the two gaurds. If you are caught, your are sent to jail. You can only be put in jail 3 times untill you are out. You get out of jail by a 'family' member tagging you and not getting caught by the gaurds on your way back 'home'. If the bible is found, you have to get your hole family to it, and all be touching it as you parade around usually shouting "WE WON!, WE WON!").

Its really fun running around the church at night... the gaurds like to jump out at everyone and scare us... I screamed so much (usually to hint to any family members (even on the other team cuz we love eachother like that, lol) that my throat was killing me, and i swear my voice is deeper today, lol. Then we played some weird games that i'd never heard of before... like Elbow tag ..

(where everyone gabs a partner and links arms and stands in a circle, but not to close to another team... and the person who is it chases someone until they link arms with someone else, and that someone else's partner has to run and link arms with another team, ext. if you are tagged you are it... it was more fun than it sounds...)

We also had devotions and stuff... i wasn't looking foward to that at all cuz...well.. you know... but we got in small groups... Jordyn, Matt, Randy, Pastor Rick & Mary Lynn (Rachel's mom/Pastor John's Wife/my newest 'adopted' mum) and we had themes we were going with, had some passages to look up and then we discussed... I really said how i felt about things, but they didn't give me weird looks or get all funky or anything, they respected them and i thought that was really cool. They liked it in fact... I love church cuz its the place where i really feel confident about myself, they all think i'm really mature and special and stuff... and it makes me feel very nice smile. Today during devotion i even told them about how i see God as not the human concept most Christians think of... but as a power greater than we can comprehend sorta who is just everywhere, and just is, not jealous or spiteful or anything like that... and then i told them I also see him when i meditate or pray or anything in a Beautiful British Isles-looking forest... As a God and Goddess (I mentioned how some christians see it as Father, Son, and Holy Ghost who is the Female, mother figure) Standing there, God with sort of a reef? Reeth? summin... on his head with Deer horns on them & no shirt, just sorta a fabric that is rapped around his midsection lots of times so its sorta like shorts? just not really on his legs.... and then i see the goddess as a beautiful woman, tall, dark wavy flowing hair, fair skin, beautiful blue eyes, and a beautiful Blue & White dress... (hard to explaine the dress really) and they are both sort of glowing... and when i pray/meditate i go there and visit them, and unload all my worries and everything.. without speaking... its just not wordly so its just thoughts are heard aloud and you can just feel So overcome with peace and stuff... Well yeah and they weren't weirded out or anything they seemed kinda impressed actually..

So yeah, Small group went well... That night we watched the Joseph & the technicolor dreamcoat cartoon thing... and ended up turning it off and me & Roo (sara L) couldn't really sleep but i ended up falling asleep probably around 4ish? Then i woke up around 9 and we had breakfast & played Elbow Tag and had some devotions and games and stuff and it was fun and i liked it smile

i have one thing to say... We have like The coolest adults around... they are really fun and they join in our games and they are just like anyone our age. & I like talking to them during meals and they don't make me feel stupid just cuz i'm a youngin'.

Oh geeze... Pastor Rick & the boys got in a rubber band fight today during small group! Mary Lynn and Christi (another very awesome adult leader who is another one of my 'adopted' mummies) were about to scream i think, hehee..... They were all hiding behind chairs and stuff shooting eachother! It was the funniest thing... especially when rick just charged at them in the little upstairs chapel we were in.... he just yelled and ran at them and jumpedon the chair blocking Matt and got him with the rubber bands... lol so mature.. Some of them were big and so i picked one up and wore it across my forehead (its now around my neck) and when they finally settled down Charlie (another adult) was like "Is that a rubber band?" and i said Yeah and i grabbed it and pulled it away from my forehead to show how big n stretchy it was and he's like "Ack! Don't let go of it and let it hit you right in the face!" and i said "Well i'm not a guy, i'm not THAT stupid" and everyone cracked up! lol i dunno why i thought i'd get mean looks but i guess it was goode timeing after their little rubber band escapades..

Rachel did a very nice end devotional and we all got letters that we had written to eachother saying thank you for coming and it was fun and stuff... And Mary Lynn wrote me the nicest letter in the world... And I had written her a pretty nice one too and she came up to me and hugged me and was like "Thank you for the letter!" i said the same and she walked away and came back and hugged me again and said in my ear "And i was going to write a PS, if you ever need me, i'll be happy to be another mom for you" It was so nice! i've always thought of Mary Lynn as a bit reserved, but i really got to know here yesterday/today... she said it because during the discussions I had mentioned things about my mom & how she was the antithesis of me & we don't exactly get along sometimes / same with brother who is a 'mini mom of the male gender' as i told them... So yeah...

Oh yeah... Today when we were playing elbow tag my grandma came into the basement/social room to say hi to us (she was there cuz she sets up communion at church & its tommarow) & She told us about the Shuttle Explosion... which you've probably heard about... if you didnt, Its an American space shuttle who came in too high.. whatever that means...and they didn't make it...it exploded. sad It was scary... we all went upstairs (up thoes 4 flights for then Millionth time) and sat in the chapel & watched the news... they even got Dan Rathers to report and when he talks about stuff like this and Sept. 11 and everything its just... His voice is so calm and deep and i dunno... its just creepy and it makes you feel this sense of impending doom... And last time we checked they finally found where the shuttle had crashed and it was sad to know that that was 7 bodies probably disenigrated right there... and how they were all alive and doing perfectly well at like 8 this morning sad.

Well i think thats all i have to say about yesterday... WAIT!!! I FORGOT!!!!! I MIGHT GET TO GO ON THE BOSTON TRIP!!!!!!!!!!!!! I'm SO EXCITED!!!!!! He's going to have to make calls and its really a pain but its worth it! I want to go SO bad! I love my youth group! They're like best friends to me... and this is like an Extended trip! We are going to see Niagra Falls & New York City on our way to Boston! The only time i've been farther east than Pittsburgh was my trip to DC so it will be fun! *does a happy dance!* And it isn't like working on houses and stuff like last time, its more like feeding the homeless and doing something with the little kids.. i think thats what Roo said... so excited! I'm a fanatic for traveling and seeing the world/other parts of my country.

OH YEAH !!! I've had this idea about putting on a Musical with the youth group for a while... we did it when we were younger, but then the Youth/Choir director Tracy moved away and pastor Rick became youth leader (after a year of ME leading middle school sunday school... i've always loved the philosophy and spirituality thats behind religion) and Melanie became youth choir director... and we did no more musicals.... So I finally went and asked around and Roo & Jordyn & Rachel & hopefully others said that they'll do it and i asked Rick and he said yes!!! he just said we should use Melanie to help us choose a musical and to use her as a 'sounding board' and stuff... but we won't use her much (not that i don't love Melanie) because i want to do this myself....... Direct the play and the music (well that will be kinda a collaboration of the cast to help me) and see if i can do this myself. I'm so excited! I'm very happy that i'll be able to do something i love smile *happy dance

OH YEAH AGAIN!!!! Rick told us about the International United Methodist Convention in 2006... he's going to take a group of 18-25 year olds! I'll be 18! Hopefully i'll still be around... depending on whatever college i'm at sad oh well i'm sure i'll be able to... that is if i earn enough money to get whereever it is.... Rick said that it was in Ireland last year smile. So YAY! I'll get to go somewhere! I just pray its not in the states because that'd not be very interesting (albeit cheap)... i've been here enough!

So um yeah... This is REALLY long and i doubt anyone has read this far... but oh well... Ugh... my mom is having a cow. She tries to boss me around WAY to much... it drives me mad.... She's yelling and she told me to put socks and stuff on and i said no cuz i'm burning up and she had a fit and told me not to leave my room.... so of course i walked right back out to the kitchen (where the computer is). I only listen to rational punishments, not just yelling. And plus, i'd never do anything deserving of a rational punishment. There she just told me to fill the humidifier and she stormed up to her room telling me what balls i have (Many many times) to just walk right back here "for the DAMN computer" as she said. No i was in the middle of typing this thank you. ugh... sometimes stuff is beyond description *sighs* But oh well smile I'm in a goode mood! I'll be even better when my internet starts working again (then i can post this & work on stuff)... Do de doo..... *coughsignmyguestmapcough*

I LOVE YOU!!!!! *GOODE mood*

[added later] Oh yeah! i forgot! preten it is friday for a few minutes!


1. As a child, who was your favorite superhero/heroine? Why?

+ Hmm... oh yeah, Kimberly off of the Original Power Rangers,hehe. She was pretty & a gymnast (which is close to dancing smile) and she knew martial arts and she was cool and Jason liked her! hehe

2. What was one thing you always wanted as a child but never got?

+ Nothing really... I pretty much got whateve i wanted, i don't think i wanted much..

3. What's the furthest from home you've been?

+ Which home? Farthest from my birthplace of Los Angeles would be my trip to D.C... Farthest from my current residence in Ohio, is probably Los Angeles, hehe

4. What's one thing you've always wanted to learn but haven't yet?

Guitar, Japanese, French, German, Sewing, goode cooking...

5. What are your plans for the weekend?

umm... the retrea and Church tommarow probably so i can talk to Rick about the Boston trip smile

Posted by Ameya @ 04:56 PM EST [Link] [Karma: -1 (+/-)] [1 hobit]

Friday, January 31, 2003

Thanks to the fabulous COLIN greymatter now works! So make sure you go visit his site! And Thanks to the also wonderful
SAM Float Downstream now has link me buttons that i know everyone i going to put on there site, right? wink. Ooo i'm SO excited! My site is now up and running and stuff!

Visit the Guestmap on the left! I love seeing where everyone is from, and who they are and stuff smile

I now have to add a buch of buttons to my buttonwall... i've met a bunch of uberspiffy people on the
Whispers & the
Bliss Boards. smile

Soon i'll be leaving for church.. we are having a retreat.. like an extended lock-in. If you dunno what that is, its where the youth group locks itself in the church and basically has a sleep over/slumber party. Its just fun to hang out with people you've known for so long, especially in our church... it has 4 storys kinda... hard to explain, its built funny... But theres a gazillion rooms even though some are off limits because its the daycare's. but yes i'm rambling.... I'm upset. My digital camera cord is at Henriques house & so its full. And plus the card is to small, it only holds a few high quality pictures & it takes to much effort everytime you turn it on to get them to take low resolution shots. So i'll have to take my regular camera which will do little goode considering it doesn't have much film left. Grr.. And Leah has had my CD player at her houe since JUNE! I'm going mad without it. *sigh* Oh well! Still excited! It'll be over around like 6pm tommarow i think...

Mom's having a cow because i'm not getting in the shower and she hates it when i don't do exactly what she says when she says it *bows to her* yesss massttterrrr.. Better leave before she gives herself a heart attack or something. I'll tell you how it went tommarow smile

Posted by Ameya @ 10:00 AM EST [Link] [Karma: -1 (+/-)] [1 hobit]

Wow! It's working now! I'm so proud of myself! hehe smile I have wanted greymatter for SO long! Yay! And how do you like the new layout? I think its my best yet smile. I've added more stuff so look around...i'm still adding more...And its not Twilight's Whipers anymore it's Float Downstream after one of my favorite beatles songs

Tommrow Never Knows
Lennon/McCartney

Turn off your mind, relax and float down stream,
It is not dying, it is not dying

Lay down al thoughts, surrender to the void,
It is shining, it is shining.

Yet you may see the meaning of within
It is being, it is being

Love is all and love is everyone
It is knowing, it is knowing

And ignorance and hate mourn the dead
It is believing, it is believing

But listen to the colour of your dreams
It is not leaving, it is not leaving

So play the game "Existence" to the end
Of the beginning, of the beginning


Drug song, sure, but thats how i think normally. smile

So yes it's 7:21 am. That's not goode. Earliest i should wake up is probably 9. I physically can't get to sleep untill like 3 or 4 in the morning and then clover wakes me up a 6! Its driving me crazy! I'm all weak and shaky. Anemics should be able to sleep! But noooo... I can never get there and when I do Clover is evil.

And why is my keyboard not working? It was fine last night and now i have to put a lot of pressure on the keys... I hope it isn't me just being weak, lol

Lets see, i also have to design and code all of the freak poductions website by the time henrique gets off schoo or he's going to go crazy, lol.. So i'm going to go finish uploading this.

Make sure you sign the Guestbook & Guestmap!

Posted by Ameya @ 05:22 AM EST [Link] [Karma: 1 (+/-)] [No hobits]

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